F*ck Your Team: Why I Hate the 2025-2026 Minnesota Wild | NHL Season Preview

F*ck Your Team: Why I Hate the 2025-2026 Minnesota Wild | NHL Season Preview

There might not be a team in the Western Conference more desperate for playoff success than the Minnesota Wild. And it all has to do with one player. After years of just being an also ran in the Central Division and being bounced early in the Western Conference playoffs, the Minnesota Wild are going to risk losing the best player maybe that their franchise has ever developed in Carell Capri off unless they can prove to him that this is the team where he can finally have some playoff success. Forget me for you should forget it. You’re living in the past, man. Last year, the Minnesota Wild were honestly just kind of a hoham team. They were projected to be a good, not great team in the Western Conference. Solidly built on the backs of a few young players like Brock Faber, Matt Baldy, and although he’s not exactly a spring chicken, Curiel Capri off. After a radioactive hot start to the season by Capriovv that had many people thinking he could be in contention for a heart trophy. He was sidelined for most of the year with an injury which kind of took the air out of most of the Wild season. The rest of the year was mainly dominated by waiting on updates for Kel Capriovv’s injury and Mark Andre Flurry Swansong. With Capri off back there was renewed hope for the Wild until they ran into the Vegas Golden Knights in the first round and were sumearily dispatched in six games. They put up a fight, made it somewhat competitive, but at the end of the day, the Wild simply didn’t have the horses to match Vegas’s death, leading them into an off season of questions and potential turmoil. Don’t turn your back on me. Let’s get one thing straight. This is shooters tour. I’ve worked hard my whole life, paid my dues, and now it’s shooters turn. And that turmoil largely centers on the forwards. Not because the Wild don’t have a great forward core. They do. But there is problems with one forward in particular, their best forward, Kuriel Capriovv. He just rejected what would be the largest contract in NHL history, eight years at $16 million per. Now, Capriovv is an absolute animal out there. And he’s worth that money, but the fact that he turned that down means he’s either a holding out for a shorter term deal or b is not coming back to Minnesota because he doesn’t think that they can get him far in the playoffs. And if it’s the former, the Wild should be able to lock him up easily. And if it’s the latter, well then Minnesota desperately needs a deep playoff run this year. And let me tell you one way to guarantee that you don’t do that is trading away your top center. And luckily the Minnesota Wild did not do that and elected to keep Marco Rossi rather than trading him away as was rumored throughout the off season. They locked him up for three years to go along with Capri off and Matt Baldy, one of the most dynamic young fours in the NHL. On the second line, you’ve got perennial silky snub doll Ericson E centering old man Vlad Terasenko who’s going to make St. Louis Blues fans see every time they play against him along with Matt Zukarelloo who unfortunately is going to be starting off the season on the injured list. Centering the third line, you got Ryan Hartman, who’s good for one brutal hit per year that will send the rest of the NHL into an absolute frenzy. While Wild fans try to insist that if you look on it in super slow-mo from the right angle, it’s actually not a dirty hit. He’ll be centering Marcus Johansson, who’s literally like a squatter for the Minnesota Wild at this point, and the one Felino brother who can actually still play hockey. On the fourth line, you’ve got Nico Sturm centering Denila, who at 21 is looking to prove that he can hold down a regular NHL role. And Yakov Trenov, the most notable thing about him is that he’s somehow making $3.5 million for the next three years. Masterclass by Bill Garin right there. As far as their young forward prospects, you have Yurov, who’s like I said getting a look this year, but also Liam Ogrren, who’s probably going to be taking Zukurella’s position while he’s on the IR, as well as Riley Height from a couple of years ago. All we hear is about that defense. They can’t stop a nose bleed. Now, the Minnesota Wild defense is absolutely loaded with young talent, and that’s highlighted by Brock Faber, the greatest squint lookalike in the NHL today. After playing absolutely lights out at Four Nations last year, Faber is looking to continue to ascend up the ranks of the best defenders in the NHL, he’ll be paired with Jake Middleton, who’s a very fine number two option for the Minnesota Wild and a very steadying presence to balance out Vabber. On the second pairing, you’ve got the WY veteran Jared Spurgeon, who is going to be tasked with mentoring one of the Wild’s best young prospects in Zeve Buouham. Buham is not just the Wild’s best prospect, he’s one of the best defensive prospects in the NHL. Well, in my opinion, and if you have a defensive core that includes him and Faber in the future, the Wild are going to be scary to play against. The third pairing consists of a couple of very good veteran players in Jonas Broaddin, who’s going to be starting the season, also on the IR along with the perennially overlooked Zack Pagosian. Taking over for Broaddin while he’s on the mend is their other good defensive prospect in David Uric. Although unlike Bouam, he comes to the wild with a few more things on him because he’s gotten bounced around in Columbus. And at 21 years old is already sort of being seen as a bit of a reclamation project. Wait, it’s not Goldberg. It’s here. Take the with Mark Andre Flurry gone, the Minnesota Wild will be riding the bus full time. That’s right. Philip Gustiffson takes over as the number one goalender permanently for the Minnesota Wild after kind of splitting duty with Flurry over the last few years. It was really a good grooming experience because he sort of ramped up to being that number one guy and now he owns the pipes and honestly Gustiffson’s developed into being a very good quality starter. I wouldn’t say he’s one of the five to 10 best goalies in the NHL, but Cus is certainly not going to cost you games. And his backup will be their best goalie prospect in Jasper Walstead. Hopefully, he can give you some quality starts and relief this year, but anything more than that that you get from him, Minnesota is just gravy on top. You ain’t going to be able to hit them. They’re too good. And you suck something up. Yes, sir. I sure do. After being cast out of New Jersey and Nashville, John Hines returns behind the bench for the Minnesota Wild. his second season with the club. Despite the fact that those fan bases absolutely loathed Hines with a hiery passion, we can’t deny what he did with Minnesota last year was very impressive. Missing Capri off for most of the year and missing Erikson Ek for a large portion of the season. He still managed to get them into the playoffs. Of course, they didn’t do anything in the playoffs, but just getting there with the limitations on this team is something to hang your hat on. Did John Hines learn from and improve on his experiences in New Jersey and Nashville? Or did he just get a little bit lucky last year with the Wild? I don’t know. We’re going to find out. It’s only like Kel Capri’s future in Minnesota hanging in the balance Wild. Since you’re new here, uh, I’m going to cut you a break. Oh, Magic Kch. What did the Minnesota Wild do to upgrade their NHL team this off season? Nothing. That’s right, folks. Once again, the Wild sat out free agency. didn’t even sniff on some of the big trade targets this off seasonason and enter the season with the exact same team and the exact same coach hoping that this time things are going to go better for them. They didn’t even have a first round draft pick to use this year. They use their second round pick on Theodore Halquist. That’s a person. Once again, Bill Garren this season with all the importance of one where Kerokov cannot bolt to another team and leave your franchise in a state of absolute [ __ ] Pretty good. pretty damn good. That’s I know I’ve been talking about Curio Capriov, but I got to admit, Matt Baldi has been really, really good. He put up 73 points last year. He’s one of the best dynamic young forwards in the NHL. And he’s only 23. There’s still a lot of room for him to continue to develop and grow. I’ll give you a winter prediction. It’s going to be cold. It’s going to be gray. and it’s going to last you for the rest of your life. So, you’re telling me that the Wild did nothing to upgrade their team, still have a very questionable coach, their goalending’s gotten a little bit weaker just because they have an unknown backup and they have injury concerns going into the season. Color me shocked if I don’t think that the Minnesota Wild are going to be a Stanley Cup contender this year. I think they’ll make the playoffs. They have too much talent not to, even though they’re in an absolutely loaded division. But they’re going to get their heads beaten in the first round again, probably by one of the teams of their division like the Jets, Avalancher, Stars, or a very good team in the Pacific as a wild card like they did last year. And if that’s how the season ends for the Wild, how do you realistically convince Capri off to stay here and continue to run into a brick wall doing this again? I know that there’s a lot of young, promising players on this team and in this system, especially with Bullium coming up, and maybe you can convince him to come back on a short-term deal, but is he really going to be swayed by wishes and hopes? [Applause] [Music] Hey, [Music]

Are the Wild going to be able to string together a deep playoff run? Can they lure back Kirill Kaprizov?

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