NFL teams based on if i think their fans would survive the apocalypse
October 15, 2025
NFL teams based on if i think their fans would survive the apocalypse
33 comments
Let’s be honest Jets fans would survive anything… 😂😂
The Saints would just pray the radiation away
If there is anybody I’m putting money on to survive in a barren wasteland, it’s folks from Wisconsin.
Northern New England would do very well. Not the massholes
The Jets have prepared me for pain, suffering, and disappointment like nothing else. I say bring it on.
Considering that last year was basically the NYG apocalypse and I spent most weekends welcoming an end to it all, I agree with this random user’s wildly subjective opinion. I definitely would’ve ran full-speed toward whatever disaster was occurring.
This year I would still probably run face first into the danger but I’d blame it on the collective CTE.
I thought the S category was going to be something like “already lives in an apocalyptic setting”. But if that was true, the Browns would need to be in there too lmao.
I dunno. Over the past decade+ Giants fans have proven their ability to deal with absolute shit. I think that mindset is transferable to the apocalypse.
Miami already has face eaters, we aren’t afraid of any thing (other than cold weather and winning football games)
Packers fans would be blacked out drunk before the rapture even started.
Survival!
Clearly OP has only been to Bourbon street, and said “yep, that’s the whole state for sure.” Never mind the hurricanes.
You think the poverty factory of sadness that is the Browns couldn’t handle the depression of the Apocalypse? C’mon now. They’ve survived this long with that pain, they should be at the top of the list.
Bills fans are insane and deal with lake effect snow. I’d move em up a tier.
KC had fans before the Mahomes era you know arrowhead still was full when we had Cassel and went 2-14
Arizona is a vast landscape with tons of gun owners
Can make bunkers out in the middle of the mountains somewhere
Pittsburgh fans couldn’t rebuild Pittsburgh when steel left, they’d be dead in hours.
Browns and Jets fans live in hell. They’d feel no difference.
Philly was literally the city that gave birth to a new nation. It could happen again? Maybe not right now but I’m trying to be optimistic since my team is letting me down.
You have obviously never met a Seahawks fan. They would be whining about the refs while burning to death.
Look props to the Minnesotans for living in the arctic in our civilized times, but at least 95% of them are not making it to spring with no power.
People in Ohio have been preparing for this shit for decades 😂 Give us a week at least.
Any fans that deal with brutal winters should be at the top. The rest of you are Charmin soft.
Let’s be real, Eagles fans caused the apocalypse
You really think that Detroit fans could rebuild civilization. They couldn’t even rebuild Detroit.
I think Cincinnati fans could survive longer than you’d think. Have you seen what we call chilli? Have you seen goetta? We ain’t rebuilding civilization; but, we’d be surviving out of dumpsters, abandoned Walmarts, and forgotten petting zoos long after the rest of y’all have turned to dust.
If the world is being repopulated by inbred Shittsburgh fans is then go ahead and make me a zombie now.
Chiefs fans survived a 50 year drought, we’ll be fine
New England has the mountain men of Vermont/New Hampshire/Maine, they’d be just fine
Glad to see my Steelers fans where we belong 😂
Why would you want to survive an apocalypse?
Eagles fans punch out cops and their horses. They’d do more than just “scrape by for awhile”.
Seahawks fans are misplaced
Most fans of KC are from rural midwest and own a ton of guns. Pretty much the #1 important thing for an apocalypse. Not around a lot of people and plenty of pew pews for protection. Half of these makes me feel like you’ve never actually met people from nor been to the cities. Seattle and denver are up high? Really? They’d just complain as they are burning alive or eaten by zombies
33 comments
Let’s be honest Jets fans would survive anything… 😂😂
The Saints would just pray the radiation away
If there is anybody I’m putting money on to survive in a barren wasteland, it’s folks from Wisconsin.
Northern New England would do very well. Not the massholes
The Jets have prepared me for pain, suffering, and disappointment like nothing else. I say bring it on.
Considering that last year was basically the NYG apocalypse and I spent most weekends welcoming an end to it all, I agree with this random user’s wildly subjective opinion. I definitely would’ve ran full-speed toward whatever disaster was occurring.
This year I would still probably run face first into the danger but I’d blame it on the collective CTE.
I thought the S category was going to be something like “already lives in an apocalyptic setting”. But if that was true, the Browns would need to be in there too lmao.
I dunno. Over the past decade+ Giants fans have proven their ability to deal with absolute shit. I think that mindset is transferable to the apocalypse.
Miami already has face eaters, we aren’t afraid of any thing (other than cold weather and winning football games)
Packers fans would be blacked out drunk before the rapture even started.
Survival!
Clearly OP has only been to Bourbon street, and said “yep, that’s the whole state for sure.” Never mind the hurricanes.
You think the poverty factory of sadness that is the Browns couldn’t handle the depression of the Apocalypse? C’mon now. They’ve survived this long with that pain, they should be at the top of the list.
Bills fans are insane and deal with lake effect snow. I’d move em up a tier.
KC had fans before the Mahomes era you know arrowhead still was full when we had Cassel and went 2-14
Arizona is a vast landscape with tons of gun owners
Can make bunkers out in the middle of the mountains somewhere
Pittsburgh fans couldn’t rebuild Pittsburgh when steel left, they’d be dead in hours.
Browns and Jets fans live in hell. They’d feel no difference.
Philly was literally the city that gave birth to a new nation. It could happen again? Maybe not right now but I’m trying to be optimistic since my team is letting me down.
You have obviously never met a Seahawks fan. They would be whining about the refs while burning to death.
Look props to the Minnesotans for living in the arctic in our civilized times, but at least 95% of them are not making it to spring with no power.
People in Ohio have been preparing for this shit for decades 😂 Give us a week at least.
Any fans that deal with brutal winters should be at the top. The rest of you are Charmin soft.
Let’s be real, Eagles fans caused the apocalypse
You really think that Detroit fans could rebuild civilization. They couldn’t even rebuild Detroit.
I think Cincinnati fans could survive longer than you’d think. Have you seen what we call chilli? Have you seen goetta? We ain’t rebuilding civilization; but, we’d be surviving out of dumpsters, abandoned Walmarts, and forgotten petting zoos long after the rest of y’all have turned to dust.
If the world is being repopulated by inbred Shittsburgh fans is then go ahead and make me a zombie now.
Chiefs fans survived a 50 year drought, we’ll be fine
New England has the mountain men of Vermont/New Hampshire/Maine, they’d be just fine
Glad to see my Steelers fans where we belong 😂
Why would you want to survive an apocalypse?
Eagles fans punch out cops and their horses. They’d do more than just “scrape by for awhile”.
Seahawks fans are misplaced
Most fans of KC are from rural midwest and own a ton of guns. Pretty much the #1 important thing for an apocalypse. Not around a lot of people and plenty of pew pews for protection. Half of these makes me feel like you’ve never actually met people from nor been to the cities. Seattle and denver are up high? Really? They’d just complain as they are burning alive or eaten by zombies