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Samantha Busch shared reflections about life since husband Kyle Busch’s death in a pair of July 26 posts

She called nights without Kyle “almost unbearable” and revealed she copes by sleeping with his shirt

“I hate it so much that his shirt doesn’t smell like him anymore,” Samantha wrote in the emotional posts

Kyle Busch‘s widow is shedding light on the “unbearable” reality of life without him, including how she has been coping with his death.

Samantha Busch revealed some of the difficulties she still faces each night in a pair of Instagram Stories shared Sunday, July 26, over two months after the two-time NASCAR champion died in May at age 41.

The first post appears to offer a glimpse into Samantha’s bedroom, specifically three framed photos from a photoshoot she did with Kyle. The couple wraps their arms around each other in the images, which are placed next to one another on a black dresser.

“You’re still the last thing I see when I close my eyes and the first thing when I wake up,” Samantha wrote over the picture of the frames.

Samantha Busch’s July 26 Instagram Stories post about husband Kyle Busch
Credit: Samantha Busch/Instagram

Samantha Busch’s July 26 Instagram Stories post about husband Kyle Busch
Credit: Samantha Busch/Instagram

In another post, she revealed that she has been sleeping with one of the late NASCAR star’s shirts in the months since his sudden death. She also described nights without him as “unbearable.”

“In the evenings when the kids go to bed the silence and loneliness is almost unbearable,” Samantha — who shared son Brexton, 11, and daughter, Lennix, 4, with Kyle  — wrote in the second post Sunday. “I pace the house thinking of all our memories.”

“I sleep tucked on my side of the bed with a body pillow and his shirt pretending he’s still next to me,” she added alongside a photo of a red long-sleeve shirt draped over a pillow. “I hate it so much that his shirt doesn’t smell like him anymore.”

NASCAR announced Kyle’s death on May 21, hours after his family said he was hospitalized for a “severe illness” later revealed to be sepsis. The organization announced the legendary driver’s death in a joint statement from his family and Richard Childress Racing.

“Our entire NASCAR family is heartbroken by the loss of Kyle Busch,” the statement read. “A future Hall of Famer, Kyle was a rare talent, one who comes along once in a generation. He was fierce, he was passionate, he was immensely skilled and he cared deeply about the sport and fans.”

Kyle Busch's familyCredit: Kyle Busch/ Instagram

Kyle Busch’s family
Credit: Kyle Busch/ Instagram

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Samantha has since shared more glimpses into the family’s life in the wake of Kyle’s death, from a touching Father’s Day tribute to the racing legend to inside looks at their son’s racing career.

Earlier this month, she shared some reflections in an Instagram post documenting a family trip to Idaho for the Fourth of July. “I’m learning that two things can be true at the same time,” she wrote alongside photos of the excursion.

“I can’t stop thinking that we should be making these memories with you, not learning how to make them without you,” she continued of Kyle. “Heartbreak and joy no longer exist separately. They simply live side by side in every moment.”

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