Just remember, you could be Tom Brady and your girl still wouldn’t care
Pssh! Valentiny wins “my dad can beat up your dad” every time.
Not some random jiujitsu teacher, that dude cucked the goat in his own house
I mean your mom is still Gisele.
My dad can beat up your dad
imagine being a regular dude, taking a criminology class at a small catholic college in Miami. watching the dolphins get their ass kicked by the patriots every damn season. cursing the name tom brady, literally wanting him to go to hell.
2 decades go by, you hate the mfer, your friends hate him, he’s ruined football for you and your whole city.
then boom, one day you fuck his supermodel millionaire wife, she falls in love with you, leaves tom, and he retires.
best revenge story in the history of sports
Not really a random Jiujitsu teacher. The Valentes practiced under Helio Gracie and own a huge school.
Source: I went there for about a year
Imagine your dad is actually around
The real tush push.
I didn’t think Giselle is attractive but I can recognize this guy guy the jackpot.
Yeah that kid is gonna hate growing up with a mom worth 400 million dollars
Now that’s a full mount.
“Ok, Giselle, I’m just going to demonstrate a full mount position here aaaaaaand I’M IN!”
That’s not what “sibling” means.
I’d be happy my dad isn’t trying to make out with me.
You mfs are weird.
Damn, giving birth at 44?
My dad can kick your dad’s ass!
Sorry hundreds of millions instead of a billion
You know, they say “pussy is undefeated.”
Which it was…until…Tom Brady.
Imagine choosing sportsball over SUPERMODEL level action.
Say what you want about the guy, but he’s a damn winner. Look at B Belichick now lol
And both will still be able to post their mom on r/oldschoolcool
Imagine if the jiujitsu kids end up being better footballers lmao
23 comments
Just remember, you could be Tom Brady and your girl still wouldn’t care
Pssh! Valentiny wins “my dad can beat up your dad” every time.
Not some random jiujitsu teacher, that dude cucked the goat in his own house
I mean your mom is still Gisele.
My dad can beat up your dad
imagine being a regular dude, taking a criminology class at a small catholic college in Miami. watching the dolphins get their ass kicked by the patriots every damn season. cursing the name tom brady, literally wanting him to go to hell.
2 decades go by, you hate the mfer, your friends hate him, he’s ruined football for you and your whole city.
then boom, one day you fuck his supermodel millionaire wife, she falls in love with you, leaves tom, and he retires.
best revenge story in the history of sports
Not really a random Jiujitsu teacher. The Valentes practiced under Helio Gracie and own a huge school.
Source: I went there for about a year
Imagine your dad is actually around
The real tush push.
I didn’t think Giselle is attractive but I can recognize this guy guy the jackpot.
Yeah that kid is gonna hate growing up with a mom worth 400 million dollars
Now that’s a full mount.
“Ok, Giselle, I’m just going to demonstrate a full mount position here aaaaaaand I’M IN!”
That’s not what “sibling” means.
I’d be happy my dad isn’t trying to make out with me.
You mfs are weird.
Damn, giving birth at 44?
My dad can kick your dad’s ass!
Sorry hundreds of millions instead of a billion
You know, they say “pussy is undefeated.”
Which it was…until…Tom Brady.
Imagine choosing sportsball over SUPERMODEL level action.
Say what you want about the guy, but he’s a damn winner. Look at B Belichick now lol
And both will still be able to post their mom on r/oldschoolcool
Imagine if the jiujitsu kids end up being better footballers lmao