F*ck Your Team: Why I Hate the 2025-2026 Ottawa Senators | NHL Season Preview

F*ck Your Team: Why I Hate the 2025-2026 Ottawa Senators | NHL Season Preview

The Ottawa Senators are a scarier team than you think. A young group that finally got the monkey off their backs and made the playoffs last year. Their first round exit to the rival Leafs might be a harbbringer of things to come. But it also might be the first step on the senator’s road to ruling the Atlantic division. What’s going to happen for them in 2025 26? Forget me for you should forget it. You’re living in the past, man. Congratulations, Ottawa Senators. You managed to end your playoff drought last year and finally made it into the playoffs where you faced your rivals in the Battle of Ontario, the Trial Maple Leafs, and were sumearily dismissed. Boy, losing to the Leafs in the playoffs, that’s like getting pistol whipped by a blind kid. But the Senators overall did have a successful year both in the development of their young stars and the contributions they got from their veteran players. Obviously, last off seasonason they finally got a legitimate goalender in Lenus Olark who wasn’t, you know, a world beater, but he was at least a competent goalender, which is something Ottawa hasn’t had in a while. And they continued to see outstanding play from their young players, most notably Brady Kachchuck and Jake Sanderson. They also got a huge boost from new coach Travis Green in his first season with Ottawa for getting them into the playoffs. But the Ottawa Senators also managed to upgrade their roster last year, making shrewd moves like acquiring Dylan Cousins from the Buffalo Sabres as well as Fabian Zetterland from the Sharks. It was almost like the Ottawa Senators were a competently run team. Like I said, they made it to the playoffs, lost to the Toronto Maple Leafs, at least showing some fight after they went down three games to uninitially, winning the next two games and potentially setting us up for the funniest, most pressure failed game seven of all time until they blew it in game six. At least you tried. Don’t turn your back on me. Let’s get one thing straight. This is shooters tour. I’ve worked hard my whole life, paid my dues, and now it’s shooters turn. The Senators war core this year is one of the most solid ones in the NHL. Their depth down the middle is absolutely disgusting. Highlighted by one of their best font forwards, Tim Stutzel. He’s had a couple of down years since his 90 point campaign in 2022 23. But if he continues to improve, he still has a ceiling of maybe being a 100 point guy for the Sens. His wings on the top line will be Fabian Zettherland who like I mentioned was acquired last year and signed an extension this off seasonason. That’s pretty good value for me. I don’t necessarily think Zetterland is right now a number one winger, but he’s definitely a middle six guy. And the other wing is the wy veteran Claude Jaru back on a one-year deal. Their second line wing on that side is Brady Kachchuck, who’s one of the best two-way wings in the entire NHL. Plays with a lot of grit and still has a ton of finish. He’s not the more popular and more winning Kachchuck brother, but he’s absolutely a demon for the Iowa Senators, which is why they need to do everything to ensure that he stays after his contract expires in a couple of years. His center on the second line is Shane Pinto, the biggest [ __ ] tease of talent in the entire NHL. Everybody swears this guy’s going to be a 50 60 point center, and he’s never evencliped 40 points in his career. On his left side is David Pon, who got signed to a short-term veteran deal last off season that is, let’s just say, a little generous to him, but he did really turn it on for Ottawa in their late run last spring. So, I think as long as he hits about 30 or 40 points this year, he’ll be worth the contract. The third line is centered by Dylan Cousins, who, like I said, was acquired last year from Buffalo and is signed to a pretty hefty extension by the Sabres before they traded him. I don’t necessarily think that he has played up to the level of that contract since signing it, but hopefully when he’s playing for a team that’s not a constant [ __ ] show like the Sabres, he might be able to actually play to his potential. And Michael Amatio, whose biggest contribution has been allowing Ottawa Senators fans to steal the mja hands gesture from Giants quarterback Tommy Devito and Ridley Grigg will be on his other side, which doesn’t really make sense to me unless they’re really trying to bolster their number of empty net slapshots. The fourth line consists of Nick Cousins, no relation to Dylan as he will profusely tell you. Lars Zeller, brought in to be a wy veteran on a prove it deal, and Arthur Calv, who is apparently a much better catfisher than he is an ice hockey player. Good lord, this story has everything. So much that Stefan should come out and talk about it. Now, most of Ottawa’s elite prospects are not forwards, so I wouldn’t expect them to be making contributions this year, but you could see guys like Lake Montgomery or Steven Holidayiday make an appearance this year. All we hear is about their defense. They can’t stop a nose bleed. The Ottawa Senator’s defense is low-key scary. And it’s highlighted by their top young defenseman, Jake Sanderson. I’ve been saying for a while that this guy is one of the most underrated young defenseman in the NHL. And he’s probably like a year or two away from having a big breakout season. And hopefully folks around the NHL are going to start recognizing just how impactful this guy is. But do you know what might make him a little bit more impactful? not being angered to a mediocre defensive partner like Artum Zub. Senators fans stand for this guy like no other, even though the analytics say he is the definition of a bottom pairing defenseman. Somebody who’s definitely not mid is Thomas Shabbat, who finally got a taste of playoff action after so many years toiling away for the sends. And good on you guys finally getting him there before he starts collecting social security. He’ll be paired with Nick Jensen, who was a castoff from Washington and rebounded to form last year with Ottawa in a rare win-win deal that saw a swap for him and Jacob Chering. On the bottom pairing, it’s Tyler, lucky number 11, and Jordan Spence just brought in from LA in a trade this off seasonason. But the Senators do also have two very promising young defenseman waiting in the wings in Carter Yakamchuk and Logan Hensler. But they’re so loaded up, I don’t foresee either of those guys getting any significant time, barring injury. Wait, it’s not Goldberg. It’s us here. the goalie. In goal, as I mentioned, it’s Lenus Olmark’s net. The guy was brought in last off season and played quite well in his first year in Ottawa. Not a world beater by any stretch of the imagination, but a 9/10 save percentage and a GA of 2.7. Nothing to sneeze at, especially for a team that was as terrible in net over the years as Ottawa had been. My only concern with Mark is that he’s never been a goalie who’s been able to play 50 55 games in a season. And the guy he’s splitting the net with, Levi Marilene, is still very green at 23 years old. Has only played in 14 NHL games. You ain’t going to be able to hit them. They’re too good. And you suck something off. Yes, sir. I sure do. Travis Green on his third stop as an NHL head coach found some success with Ottawa last year, getting them into the playoffs for the first time in over half a decade. And while doing that might be enough to wow Sense fans, I will remind you that that’s only the second time in his head coaching career that Travis Green has managed to get a team into the playoffs. And while you might oo and awe the fact that you made your defense into something that’s not total horseshit, uh that’s really because of your talent. And if you look at how Kucks and Devils fans reacted to his hiring, it was very much a meh. So maybe he’s gotten better, but maybe he’s just an also ran head coach who is taking advantage of an incredibly talented team in Ottawa. I think it’s more the latter. Since you’re new here, uh I’m going to cut you a break. The Senator signings were all around the fringes and retaining the players that they already had on the roster. The only names that they brought in free agency were Calav and Eller, but their biggest move, no doubt, was adding Jordan Spencer in the LA Kings, and I still cannot believe that LA allowed this to happen. Spence is one of the better young ascending defenseman in my opinion. He’s at minimum a 34 guy right now with the potential to maybe develop into a year number two. You don’t even need that out of him. UV just plays at this level for the next few years, you got a very solid guy to round out your top four when guys like Jensen eventually walk. Now, in the draft, the Ottawa Senators made a pretty solid pick in the first round. In Logan Hensler, my only problem with it really is the fact that the Ottawa Senators have so many good young defenseman in their system already between Sanderson, Spence, and Yakamchuk. I think that they probably should have been looking to go forward here. But in terms of where the value was, I think that this is a fine place to take a guy like Logan Enler. Pretty good. Pretty damn good. That’s Shane Pinto is one of the most interesting players on the entire Ottawa Senators team because despite the fact that he led the team in shift started in the defensive zone, he was also one of the best players on the team at generating offense. 21 goals scored four is incredibly impressive. And even though he only had 16 assists, it’s kind of hard to put up a lot of those when you’re playing with guys like Ridley Grigg, Nick Cousins, and Michael Lamatio. I’ll give you a winter prediction. It’s going to be cold, it’s going to be gray, and it’s going to last you for the rest of your life. Ottawa made the playoffs last year, and I fully expect them to do it again this year. They’re still a very young team that’s continuing to grow and improve and they made some moves this offseason that I really like to improve their team. I think that this is a team that’s not just going to be a wild card team this year. I think that they have a legitimate shot to leaprog a team like the Toronto Maple Leafs and be the number three team in the Atlantic Division. And with how absolutely loaded their back end is and with some solid play from Lena Solar again this year, assuming he’s able to maybe shoulder a little bit more of the load, I think that this is a team that could legitimately be a surprise contender for the Atlanta division. I know that that’s ridiculous to say with the Florida Panthers, the two-time defending Stanley Cup champions, and the Tampa Bay Lightning in that division, but I’m really high on the Ottawa Senators this year. Would I bet on them to win the Atlantic? Absolutely not. But if you were to give me odds on it, I might throw a little money that way. I think Ottawa is going to surprise a lot of teams this year. [Applause] [Music] Hey, [Music] hey, hey. [Music]

The Senators are one of the most exciting young teams in the East. Are they about to take the next step and challenge for the Atlantic title?

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