When your work is meant for public consumption, you receive in return what is often the best humanity has to offer. And also the worst.
MLB bans fan who taunted Ketel Marte to tears
White Sox fans cheered for their opponent today at Rate Field. This was game three of series with the Arizona Diamondbacks
Fox – 32 Chicago
Diamondbacks player Ketel Marte was recently heckled by a fan about his deceased mother.The heckler was removed from the stadium and banned from all MLB venues.It’s easy to sympathize with Marte, having experienced similar harassment after the deaths of my mother and wife.
There are not many occupations for which the critics of your work feel they are entitled to mock your dead mother.
Ketel Marte, the Arizona Diamondbacks’ all-star second baseman, works in such a profession.
So do I.
During the June 24 DBacks game against the White Sox in Chicago, Marte choked up on the field and dissolved into tears after a fan yelled derogatory comments about his deceased mother, Elpidia Valdez.
I have considerable experience in this area. Unwanted expertise.
Crude comments often come anonymously
It began for me not too long after my mother passed away in late 1997 and I wrote about how, at her funeral service, “a son’s limited capacity for writing proved to be no match for a mother’s genius at living.”
When your work is meant for public consumption, as is mine, as is Marte’s, you receive in return what is often the very best that humanity has to offer. And also the worst.
“Too bad your dead mom didn’t have a miscarriage back in the day,” I was told.
“Hopefully, your mother passed on that cancer gene and we’ll be done with you soon.”
It went like that from unnamed dolts, on and off, for years.
The comments always come from a distance, as happened in Chicago for Marte with the heckling fan.
Ketel Marte felt the impact of a coward’s bravado
They are most often anonymous. Never face to face, and include emails, phone messages, social media comments, regular mail.
It faded for me after a time, then picked up again in 2021, when my wife died.
You can imagine the comments.
Or, better yet, you can’t. And you’ll never need to do so.
It is a simple fact that too many of our brothers and sisters lack perspective, lack self-control, lack common sense. And, most importantly, lack courage.
What Marte experienced in Chicago was a coward’s bravado.
Emotional wounds heal, but scars are easily reopened
The loud-mouthed 22-year-old idiot who heckled Marte (from a safe distance) was kicked out of the ballpark and later banned from all Major League venues.
DBacks manager Torey Lovullo said of his conversation with Marte, “(I told him), ‘I love you and I’m with you and we’re all together and you’re not alone. No matter what happens, no matter what was said or what you heard, that guy is an idiot. It shouldn’t have an impact on you.’”
No, it shouldn’t. And it probably won’t.
But it takes time. In some cases, lots and lots of time.
Marte’s mom died in a car accident that occurred shortly after speaking with her son on the phone.
Trauma like that heals slowly, if at all.
Particularly for someone in an occupation for which the critics of his work feel they are entitled to reopen the wound.
Reach Montini at ed.montini@arizonarepublic.com.
Like this column? Subscribe to get more opinions content.