Image courtesy of Flickr/Andy Witchger
When the Minnesota Twins introduced Derek Shelton as their new manager on Tuesday, all the questions centered around roster construction, coaching hires, and other baseball ephemera. In another case of the media failing to ask the truly tough questions, at no point did anyone ask, “Derek, are you also the lead singer of The National?”
Allegedly, Matt Berninger is the vocalist for the New York-based alt-rock band. But the resemblance between Berninger and Shelton demands answers, one that only an independent outlet like Twins Daily is brave enough to uncover. Here’s what we know so far:
They both have graying hair and full beards.
They both wear chunky black glasses, which really heightens the resemblance.
Shelton appears burlier than Berninger, but with the rise of Ozempic and other weight-loss drugs, that’s hardly negative proof.
Shelton has never denied being in The National.
Berninger has never denied being the former bench coach for the Minnesota Twins.
They both, when dressed in street clothes, look like they have opinions on bourbon, cologne, and red wine.
Shelton is a baseball lifer. Berninger writes his songs on baseballs.
The National is known for Berninger’s dark, enigmatic lyrics, which have earned them the tag of “Sad Dad” music. Derek Shelton managed the Pittsburgh Pirates, who have made Pennsylvania dads incredibly sad for the last few decades.
This last connection (or lack thereof) is why I think there’s something to the story. The National is perhaps best known for collaborating with Taylor Swift. Shelton has never made his opinion on Taylor Swift publicly known, which frankly raises more questions than it answers. Even people who don’t listen to music have an opinion on Taylor Swift, usually about how seeing her during a football game makes them upset for some reason. What is he hiding? I have a pretty good idea.
In conclusion, if you notice the National only touring from November (ok, October) through early February, or Shelton taking a leave of absence during the season for “a personal matter at an upstate New York recording studio,” you’re not alone. You’re not crazy. You might just be seeing through the lies.
Image license here.