In March, the St Louis Cardinals finished at above .500 with a three wins, two losses record. Only a few teams hit more home runs than the Cardinals, I mean, four. Is that a few? Only five teams had more RBI. You know who’s at the top? The damn devil magic Brewers. They also have 11 stolen bases so far and are tied with the Dodgers in walk percentage.
On offense, the March 2026 Cardinals didn’t take many walks but rarely ever struck out. Their BABIP was only .275, but they still did well. The problem with the March 2026 Cardinals offense was that they didn’t get on base enough. But, they could hit some home runs…
The March 2026 Cardinals were good at baserunning but pretty average on defense, overall. At least according to fangraphs. March 2026 Jordan Walker was an on-base machine and scored 6 times, with tons of power. Nolan Gorman had even more, but had some BABIP issues. Gorman had monster power, however, with a .429 ISO. Gorman struck out 21.4% of the time in March. Not bad!
March 2026 Alec Burleson was another of the top Cardinals hitters, with the ability to take walks, hit for average, and for power. After that torrid month, the sky’s the limit for Alec Burleson. Church, Winn, and Herrera all had a lackluster March.
Tell me what you think of Victor Scott II’s arm strength vs arm value ratings? His sprint speed is 100 percentile!
April Fool’s! Ha! all that’s too small of a sample size to write about. But March was a full five games, you cannot discount it. Totally. Dude.
What can you say about March Masyn Winn? He’s not striking out or whiffing a lot, he’s his old self. He’s not chasing much. He’s just not hitting the ball hard. His bad speed is pretty slow. Maybe he’s just warming up.
So far Burleson is 85th percentile or more in whiff rate and k rate. He is among the best at squaring up the ball. Could work on his bat speed and chase percentage, still. Middling at best. And, as always, Burly don’t take many walks.
Jordan Walker is among the leaders in bat speed, hard hit percentage, and average exit velocity. Very good sprint speed and arm strength. He’s been good on the bases. Our most valuable player for March 2026! Who saw that one coming.
JJ Wetherholt was an above average hitter in March 2026 who showed unusual poise for an MLB initiate. He is going to be a good one. I think he was born to hit baseballs, and to be a plus defender.
OK let your April tomfoolery commence in the comments!
Roland Kayn – ‘Tektra’ my life is changed after finding the work of Roland Kayn… cybernetic networks… interfacing… the future was in 1984… mysterious synthesizer experiments that sound like nothing elsePrefab Sprout – ‘Swoon’ sophistipop at its finest! that bass player! prog ish alt pop way ahead of its timeRush – ‘Grace Under Pressure’ one of the top tier Rush albums and a signature sound for the 1980’s! Not one of their most well known albums but don’t let that stop you… there’s a chance also, even if you don’t like Rush, that you might like just this album… it stands in its own territory.Minutemen – ‘Double Nickels On The Dime’ I could easily put this as #1, if you want to know where the Jackass theme song comes from, look no further! this is just a wild collection of songs that no one ever heard before.Butthole Surfers – ‘Psychic… Powerless… Another Man’s Sac’ this is just wild and sounds like nothing else, I really dig the production on this and how “new” it sounds, especially for 1984.Foetus – ‘Hole’ oft-overlooked proto-industrial madness! Pure genius for 1984. Absolutely futuristic.Trouble – ‘Psalm 9’ my favorite heavy metal album from 1984… early doom, sludge… essential.Black Flag – ‘My War’ if you like Henry Rollins, you’ll love this… but if you like some of the most creative early punk rock material, this is a must listen. Those songs are coming at you from all sides!Celtic Frost – ‘Morbid Tales’ proto-death metal and insanely influential on the beginnings of black metal. Originators.Metallica – ‘Ride The Lightning’ my generation’s classic rock. It’s not as groundbreaking as Kill Em All but takes their songwriting to the next level. No sophomore slump here for Metallica.Su Tissue – ‘Salon de Musique’ This out Steve Reichs Steve Reich. This is where I have to admit I forgot to include Suburban Lawns in 1981! If you like Suburban Lawns (similar to Talking Heads and Devo) you’ll want to hear their singer’s solo album, which has nothing to do with Suburban Lawns style but it’s a masterpiece of 20th century classical.Prince – ‘Purple Rain’ the masterpiece concept album! The remaster is so fantastic.Sade – ‘Diamond Life’ the somewhat rare pop album where every song is top notch and just flows together. Signature 80’s sound. I don’t even know how many times I’ve listened to this album, Sade is the best.Scott Walker – ‘Climate of Hunter’ did you know Scott Walker put out a very sophisticated sounding 80s pop album? Well now you do!Christian Death – ‘Catastrophe Ballet’ early goth rock and death rock perfect album. The guitarist is their secret weapon. Understated mastery.Cardiacs – ‘The Seaside’ no one else like the Cardiacs… especially early on.Univers Zero – ‘Uzed’ chamber prog awesomeness…Run D.M.C. – ‘Run DMC’ hiphop was around for a little while before 1984 but this is the year that the genre really starts to hit the mass market. And Run D.M.C.’s debut was a huge reason hiphop started to land in a lot of ears. It wasn’t their big breakthrough yet, but key to hip hop history.Chaka Khan – ‘I Feel For You’ top tier electro-pop… if you grew up in the 80s, you knew about Chaka Khan.Wham – ‘Make It Big’ super huge pop album, full of mega-hits… how can you not love this album. It was everywhere in the 80s, so maybe that is why. But it’s just a part of the 80s soundtrack.
Honorable mention: Mercyful Fate – ‘Don’t Break The Oath’ I really wanted to get this metal masterpiece into the to 20 but ultimately the vocals are so completely ridiculous that it is only for short listens and novelty purposes only. I kid, I kid, but there’s something about his vocals on this one that are just too off, or something. It’s not a bad album, but, yeah. The vocals.
Pull my leg in the comments.