BUZZERS BEATERS are awesome.

And jersey retirements are awesome.

But incessant .500 records, not so much.

Forty-five games into the 2025-26 season, Bulls truthers are celebrating the fact that their guys are above .500, like it’s a big deal. All it means is that maybe 14% of their games are more interesting, and they might get home-court in the Play-In Tournament.

Yay.

Fortunately, there are whispers that the Bulls front office is ready to blow it up — finally, yeesh — and much of the buzz surrounds a potential deal built around New Orleans Pelicans’ star-crossed big man, Zion Williamson.

Thought to be the future of the league when he was chosen #1 by the Pellies in the 2019 NBA Draft, Williamson has almost lived up to expectations, averaging 24.3 points and 6.0 boards to go with a 57.9% shooting percentage,

Maybe those aren’t generational numbers, but they do put the former Dookie in some elite company:

Thing is, Zion is a walking injury who’s missed long stretches of time with a wide array of ouchies:

All of which means that Williamson has played 246 out of a possible 520 regular season, giving him a 52.7% miss rate — great for a shooting percentage, garbage for time on an NBA court.

So why would a Chicago franchise that’s two seasons removed from dealing with another injury-prone high-end draft pick take a shot on Williamson?

Because it looks like they realize it’s time.

To that end, here are five potential high risk/high reward deals that would get the 6’6”, 285-pounder into red and black.

(Note: The trades are relatively similar due to the salary cap. Thanks a lot, salary cap.)

The Scoop: In terms of outgoing players, Vooch and/or Coby kinda need to be included in any deal due to a changing franchise direction, future money, and positional fit.

The Pelicans might balk at this one, as in terms of draft position, the Bulls are good enough to avoid the lottery — which isn’t saying much — so New Orleans would get an old center in Vooch, a potential rental in Coby, and a low-end first rounder. Meh.

But if they’re desperate to get Zion out of the building, they could sure do worse.

Patrick Williams

Coby White

Bulls 2026 first-round pick (top-six protected, converts to top-ten in 2027, then lottery-protected in 2028)

Bulls 2027 second-round pick

The Scoop: It would be tough for the Pelicans to take on Patrick Williams’ historically moronic contract — not to mention Patrick Williams himself — but the improved draft capital might make that easier to swallow. Then again, it’s Patrick Williams, so.

The Scoop: The Pelicans front office would have to be loaded with birdbrains to sign off on this one. But you know what? The Pelicans front office is loaded with birdbrains, so anything’s possible.

Coby White

Patrick Williams

Bulls 2026 first-round pick (Top-10 protected)

Bulls 2028 first-round pick (Top-12 protected, converts to two 2nds if not conveyed)

The Scoop: Two firsts would likely get a Zion deal across the finish line, and while that’s a whole lot for the Bulls to fork over, it would get Williams out of the United Center, so bring it. This is as good a time as any to note that Williamson is only 13 months older than Williams.

The Scoop: Just in case the Pels have no interest in White or Vooch (understandable), here’s one that Bulls fans will hate. Yes, Williams would be going, but Ayo is a fan favorite (justifiably so) and Smith is turning out to be one of the best bargains on the team, if not the NBA. But to make a cake, you have to break some eggs, and it’s time to get a’breakin’.