What a time to be alive, my friends!
And I don’t only say that merely because of the bitter chill of winter, and the way it makes the days more crisp, and reveals to me which of my blue jeans have developed holes in them since I put them away in the spring. It’s a great time for football, too.
The sheer unpredictability of this random season has finally settled down into some great playoff races, even if they are a time of great change from what we’re used to seeing.
With that in mind, here’s my 10 things I love about the last month of this season.
1. Last week the Cowboys lost on Thursday night and it looked like the season was over. Then the Eagles responded by dropping the ball like it was buttered, so there’s still a chance this division could be up for grabs. That gives us hopefully four more weeks of NFC East drama.
2. No one has clinched a playoff spot yet, although three teams could lock up a postseason berth this week. However, one of those teams is not the Chiefs, who by Monday could be missing the playoffs for the first time since that “Interstellar” movie was in theaters. Which makes no sense to me, either the scenario or that movie.
3. As of right now, we have six new division champions, five new playoff teams, and zero postseason hopes for any team with “New York” in their names.
4. We started the season with the AFC having the four best quarterbacks in the league. Currently none of them are leading their divisions, and only one looks like he’ll be in the playoffs. And Joe Burrow looks like he came back early just so he could have more zip on his interceptions than the Bengals were getting from Joe Flacco.
5. Somehow, at 3-10, the Washington Commanders are one of the most important teams in the NFC because they have three games left against the Eagles and Cowboys. And I don’t know if I’d take Washington to win an intrasquad scrimmage right now.
6. The NFC is so tight, Chicago went from the number one seed to the last wild card spot on one end zone interception.
7. Indianapolis was so thrilled to be in a playoff hunt for the first time in recent memory, when their quarterback was lost for the season they ran out and called up former Colt Philip Rivers. Why? Possibly because Bert Jones doesn’t own a cell phone.
8. It’s not out of the question that three of the four teams who played in the conference championship games last year could miss the playoffs entirely. And one of them could end up with a top five draft pick next year.
9. Four of my top five picks for MVP would be new award winners. Right now I’ve got Maye, Stafford, Allen, Love, and Dak on my list. And yes, Dak’s been good enough for consideration, even if the rest of the season is pretty maddening. Leave it to Dallas to figure out a way to be a .500 team after playing an odd number of games.
10. And maybe, most surprisingly of all, it looks like the Cleveland Browns might have done the right thing. Although in true Browns form, they did it in the wrong way, which might ruin things next season. But hey, take your kudos where you can, right?
Time for my week 15 picks. Last week, I went 2-4 straight up, and 3-3 against Vegas. In my defense, I wasn’t expecting Minnesota to score all of its remaining points at once. Lesson learned there. On the season, I’m 56-36-1 straight up, and 44-48-1 against the Vegas spread. Here’s my picks for this week. As always, these are for the purposes of comedic discussion only. No wagering.
Minnesota (+5.5) at Dallas: For Cowboys fans, let me explain what it was like in the offseason when the Vikings released Sam Darnold and kept JJ McCarthy. Remember when Tom Landry had to make the decision between Roger Staubach and Craig Morton? Just imagine if he had kept Quincy Carter instead.
Pick: Cowboys to win and cover, winning by six points or more.
Indianapolis (+13.5) at Seattle: The Colts have caused a real crisis around my house, because the first draft of this column was literally nothing but Philip Rivers jokes.
Pick: Seahawks to win and cover, winning by 14 points or more.
Cleveland (+7.5) at Chicago: Last week, Shedeur Sanders became just the second rookie in NFL history to throw for 350 yards with three passing and one rushing touchdown in the same game. And since he plays for the Browns, they still lost.
Pick: Browns to win it outright.
Washington (+2.5) at NY Giants: These two teams are a combined zero-for-their-last-fifteen games, and there is absolutely no reason for either one to break that streak this week.
Pick: Commanders to win it outright.
Arizona (+9.5) at Houston: I have a reminder that pops up on my desktop every year right after the final game of the regular season that says “Defense wins playoff games.” This year, that’s for you, Texans.
Pick: Texans to win and cover, winning by 10 points or more.
Miami (+3) at Pittsburgh: The Steelers team is old-school. And by that I mean most of their players are old enough I could have gone to school with them.
Pick: Steelers to win and cover, winning by four points or more.
I’ll also take the Panthers over the Saints, the Broncos over the Packers, and playing in a bowl game over visiting family for Christmas. Good luck, my friends.
Reid Kerr thinks Zoom should have a button that pretends the internet is frozen so you can yawn or go make a sandwich. You can always send questions, comments, and angry messages to him on Threads at @snowfire51.