44 uniforms till kickoff #16 – Black helmet w/ teal sparkle/White jersey/Black pants/Black socks
August 26, 2022
44 uniforms till kickoff #16 – Black helmet w/ teal sparkle/White jersey/Black pants/Black socks
3 comments
Sorry for the super late one, office had me swamped today. The show must go on, though. Today we finish off the 2009 set with the main road look, which may be the only Jags uniform I’ve never seen a single person say something nice about. Imagine all of the failures of yesterdays teal version, then add in the fact that they did all they could to cut teal out of the design. Like, it’s there, technically, moreso than the lone teal swoosh on the current roads, but look at that pic and tell me that you’re really feeling that teal, that the teal strokes in the piping and teal outline on the numbers are actually visible without holding your phone five inches from your face. Hell, I think I’d even take todays white jersey simply because it doesn’t pretend to have teal involved beyond the swoosh. The present-yet-invisible teal outlines on these just makes the black parts look kinda fuzzy in motion rather than a two-toned teal and black tandem.
This near-omission was completely intentional, and they were very frank about it during this particular unveil. Straight from the mouth of Wayne, they thought it would be a nifty quirk if they “kept teal in Jacksonville” (barring that the opposing home team never wears their whites). I mean, the fuck? That’s our fucken color, bro. You could probably imagine they were already heading down this path when they cut the teal numbers from the white jerseys and teal stripes from the black pants, but, oh my god! He admit it[!](https://youtu.be/cY2xBNWrBZ4)
Of course, I can admit that I definitely asked my dad for a white MJD jersey in the new style for my birthday that year, and I wore it proudly for years because it simply looked way better in person. The teal was actually visible up close and the toothpaste squiggles actually did their job on a controlled, uniformly-produced, loose-fitting shirt that hasn’t yet been corrupted by Reebok’s skin-tight templates.
Oh yeah, the templates. God, what a mess. If there was anything redeeming about the initial design, it was swiftly burned to the ground by Reebok’s horrible on-field jersey templates, primarily the new experimental template featuring the tightest fitting, most body-comformative fabric of all time which became the precursor for Adidas’s [awful Tech-Fit](https://footballscoop.com/.image/t_share/MTgwODU1MzE0MzY0MjQ1MDgw/ucla5.jpg) template which would take over college ball throughout the ‘10s (Adidas owned Reebok from 2006 till last year, fun fact). The gimmick was that the fabric was suuuuuper stretchy, making the players 6.9% faster, or something. The Jags were one of the teams experimented on, and the results were horrifying, to say the least. The underarm stripes were [horrendously distorted](https://farm3.static.flickr.com/2717/4202804315_ba77497b4f_o.png) and cut off by the arm holes to where they were unrecognizable from the initial reveal. The names on the back were [bulgey and weird](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2583/4004015781_de38aea1df_o.png) since apparently a proper nameplate would have hindered the players too much in their cutting edge, top of the line techno-tops. And don’t even get me started on what they did to those [poor, poor Colts.](http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4005/4201082630_a75160b6eb_o.png) It was like every player was wearing a completely different jersey. Nike would come to the rescue in 2012 with their [Elite 51 template,](https://www.si.com/.image/ar_4:3%2Cc_fill%2Ccs_srgb%2Cfl_progressive%2Cq_auto:good%2Cw_1200/MTY4MjU5NjM4MjUzMjAxMjgx/130321122518-maurice-jones-drew-single-image-cutjpg.jpg) setting the record straight and bringing the piping back (roughly) to where it belonged for one year before the team changed course again in 2013. At least for one fateful year, this ugly, ugly jersey got to be seen for what it was truly meant to be.
Before we move on to the 2008 uniform (bet you didn’t know 2008 had its own special twist, did you?), I have to touch on the helmets at least once. Look, guys, it’s a really cool concept and I know it’s very popular around here, with several calls to bring it back. However, I must gripe that I personally wouldn’t do such for one simple reason: it didn’t work! Yeah, you can pull up [high def stills](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/Rpa33yqFzApXKpLofBE_mCRhq7Q=/0x78:4000×2745/1400×1050/filters:focal(0x78:4000×2745):format(jpeg)/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/4119183/156942519.0.jpg) where the sun does indeed bounce off the dome just right and the tealiness truly sparkles through. And yet, tell me why me and my dad had a running joke throughout the lifetime of this helmet where we would pretend to go fucking nuts for the one to two instances per game that it actually showed up on screen? “ITS THE THING! ITS DOING THE THING!” we would exclaim in jest of its apparent uselessness otherwise. I watched every single Jags game during that stretch (or, in 2009’s case, the highlights) and it just didn’t show up. And the sparkle paint would appear dull in most other circumstances when the light *didnt* hit it just right, making the helmet look more like a [dark bluish-grey](https://www.helmethistory.com/uploads/8/3/1/5/8315957/published/2012-jags-v4.png?1600142429) than the classic pure black we know and love. So, call me a hater but I say keep it, like everything else from that era’s wanton wardrobe (except for those nice plain black socks. What can I say? It’s hard to mess those up, or so you’d think.).
Phew. Gang, we made it through all of the ugly. Starting tomorrow, it’s all crawlers and beautiful black helmets and tasteful gold accents and, above all, pure classic Jaguars aesthetics from here till gameday. Thanks for trudging through the muck with me, and for tolerating my psycho rants, and for sharing in my wacky obsession. I give the first bad uniform we ever wore a ⭐️1/2.
First seen: 9/13/2009, week 1 @ the Colts
Mod blocked
Damn this pic takes me back lol. I shit on Gabbert a lot over the years and yeah he’s a bust, but he quietly carved out a nice backup career for himself after Jacksonville. And he actually doesn’t look half bad when he plays. In reality he was like a 3rd/4th round talent (solid backup draft range)taken way too early. Bortles took us farther(kinda by default), but Blaine seems to have more lasting power in the league.
3 comments
Sorry for the super late one, office had me swamped today. The show must go on, though. Today we finish off the 2009 set with the main road look, which may be the only Jags uniform I’ve never seen a single person say something nice about. Imagine all of the failures of yesterdays teal version, then add in the fact that they did all they could to cut teal out of the design. Like, it’s there, technically, moreso than the lone teal swoosh on the current roads, but look at that pic and tell me that you’re really feeling that teal, that the teal strokes in the piping and teal outline on the numbers are actually visible without holding your phone five inches from your face. Hell, I think I’d even take todays white jersey simply because it doesn’t pretend to have teal involved beyond the swoosh. The present-yet-invisible teal outlines on these just makes the black parts look kinda fuzzy in motion rather than a two-toned teal and black tandem.
This near-omission was completely intentional, and they were very frank about it during this particular unveil. Straight from the mouth of Wayne, they thought it would be a nifty quirk if they “kept teal in Jacksonville” (barring that the opposing home team never wears their whites). I mean, the fuck? That’s our fucken color, bro. You could probably imagine they were already heading down this path when they cut the teal numbers from the white jerseys and teal stripes from the black pants, but, oh my god! He admit it[!](https://youtu.be/cY2xBNWrBZ4)
Of course, I can admit that I definitely asked my dad for a white MJD jersey in the new style for my birthday that year, and I wore it proudly for years because it simply looked way better in person. The teal was actually visible up close and the toothpaste squiggles actually did their job on a controlled, uniformly-produced, loose-fitting shirt that hasn’t yet been corrupted by Reebok’s skin-tight templates.
Oh yeah, the templates. God, what a mess. If there was anything redeeming about the initial design, it was swiftly burned to the ground by Reebok’s horrible on-field jersey templates, primarily the new experimental template featuring the tightest fitting, most body-comformative fabric of all time which became the precursor for Adidas’s [awful Tech-Fit](https://footballscoop.com/.image/t_share/MTgwODU1MzE0MzY0MjQ1MDgw/ucla5.jpg) template which would take over college ball throughout the ‘10s (Adidas owned Reebok from 2006 till last year, fun fact). The gimmick was that the fabric was suuuuuper stretchy, making the players 6.9% faster, or something. The Jags were one of the teams experimented on, and the results were horrifying, to say the least. The underarm stripes were [horrendously distorted](https://farm3.static.flickr.com/2717/4202804315_ba77497b4f_o.png) and cut off by the arm holes to where they were unrecognizable from the initial reveal. The names on the back were [bulgey and weird](http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2583/4004015781_de38aea1df_o.png) since apparently a proper nameplate would have hindered the players too much in their cutting edge, top of the line techno-tops. And don’t even get me started on what they did to those [poor, poor Colts.](http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4005/4201082630_a75160b6eb_o.png) It was like every player was wearing a completely different jersey. Nike would come to the rescue in 2012 with their [Elite 51 template,](https://www.si.com/.image/ar_4:3%2Cc_fill%2Ccs_srgb%2Cfl_progressive%2Cq_auto:good%2Cw_1200/MTY4MjU5NjM4MjUzMjAxMjgx/130321122518-maurice-jones-drew-single-image-cutjpg.jpg) setting the record straight and bringing the piping back (roughly) to where it belonged for one year before the team changed course again in 2013. At least for one fateful year, this ugly, ugly jersey got to be seen for what it was truly meant to be.
Before we move on to the 2008 uniform (bet you didn’t know 2008 had its own special twist, did you?), I have to touch on the helmets at least once. Look, guys, it’s a really cool concept and I know it’s very popular around here, with several calls to bring it back. However, I must gripe that I personally wouldn’t do such for one simple reason: it didn’t work! Yeah, you can pull up [high def stills](https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/Rpa33yqFzApXKpLofBE_mCRhq7Q=/0x78:4000×2745/1400×1050/filters:focal(0x78:4000×2745):format(jpeg)/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/4119183/156942519.0.jpg) where the sun does indeed bounce off the dome just right and the tealiness truly sparkles through. And yet, tell me why me and my dad had a running joke throughout the lifetime of this helmet where we would pretend to go fucking nuts for the one to two instances per game that it actually showed up on screen? “ITS THE THING! ITS DOING THE THING!” we would exclaim in jest of its apparent uselessness otherwise. I watched every single Jags game during that stretch (or, in 2009’s case, the highlights) and it just didn’t show up. And the sparkle paint would appear dull in most other circumstances when the light *didnt* hit it just right, making the helmet look more like a [dark bluish-grey](https://www.helmethistory.com/uploads/8/3/1/5/8315957/published/2012-jags-v4.png?1600142429) than the classic pure black we know and love. So, call me a hater but I say keep it, like everything else from that era’s wanton wardrobe (except for those nice plain black socks. What can I say? It’s hard to mess those up, or so you’d think.).
Phew. Gang, we made it through all of the ugly. Starting tomorrow, it’s all crawlers and beautiful black helmets and tasteful gold accents and, above all, pure classic Jaguars aesthetics from here till gameday. Thanks for trudging through the muck with me, and for tolerating my psycho rants, and for sharing in my wacky obsession. I give the first bad uniform we ever wore a ⭐️1/2.
First seen: 9/13/2009, week 1 @ the Colts
Mod blocked
Damn this pic takes me back lol. I shit on Gabbert a lot over the years and yeah he’s a bust, but he quietly carved out a nice backup career for himself after Jacksonville. And he actually doesn’t look half bad when he plays. In reality he was like a 3rd/4th round talent (solid backup draft range)taken way too early. Bortles took us farther(kinda by default), but Blaine seems to have more lasting power in the league.