Foul Territory on Twitter: “Pete Alonso had no choice but to swing at a first pitch because he had to go to poop so bad after a poorly timed timed pregame coffee. That swing? Home Run. Then straight to the bathroom. 💀”

20 comments

1. There should be a clause in which you are excused from running the bases because I’ve had some gnarly cramps subsequent to holding a number two.

2. I too know what it’s like to have too shit after drinking coffee

3. The trots

4. Omg 😂😂😂😂😂

5. You know, I was actually wondering about this yesterday. How come ballplayers never have to take inconvenient shits. Such pros.

6. The Home Runs

7. Rounding the bases

8. Makes you wonder when you’ve seen players strikeout on purpose to go take a dump

9. this is so funny

10. When you’re running to first and your pants start to burst…

11. [i swear on my life i called this in real time](https://streamable.com/b5rs0l)

12. Bear Necessities

13. George Brett would like a word.

14. Imagine if he’d gotten on base… Might have called a pinch runner so he could pinch one out

15. When you’re sliding into third, and you feel a great big turd…

16. Sometimes I think of myself as a pretty good fan. More knowledge than most, you know? Then there are people who, on the fly, can recall pitch counts and which pitch it was from random at bats from games weeks ago.

17. When your sliding into home and your pants are full of foam.

18. This happened to me while umping a little league game the other night. I had to run into the shitter between innings in my gear. It wasn’t fun.

19. [The shuffle as he rounds second.](https://www.mlb.com/video/pete-alonso-homers-13-on-a-fly-ball-to-left-field)

20. I’ve never related to Pete more. I work in live events and have to put careful consideration into my caffeine intake before shows