Every team is made up of literally what their team name says they are. In a free-for-all battle royal with no weapons or magic, who wins?
March 17, 2024
Every team is made up of literally what their team name says they are. In a free-for-all battle royal with no weapons or magic, who wins?
38 comments
Probably Giants
Titans stomp. Literally.
Probably the titans or jets
The Browns one is hilariously sad lol
Actually the Cardinals are a 1940s baseball dynasty
Fuckin Raiders cracked me up. 💀
Got a good laugh out of some of these. Thanks for that.
Unless Jets or Giants can kill Titans, it’s the Titans.
Titans and it’s not close. It took 10 years for a pantheon of literal gods to defeat them.
You cannot defeat a color
Saints with a miracle.
That’s exactly how I picture the Chiefs
Raiders will run in before the rest of the teams are ready.
Leeeroy mmmJenkinnnssss!!!!
I’m going Bears or Lions with this one. Maybe slight edge to lions since they work together as a group.
Nah, Jets stomp Titans. An F-16 could annihilate Kronos
AFC EAST: Jets
ACF NORTH: Bengals
AFC SOUTH: Titans
AFC WEST: Raiders
NFC EAST: Giants
NFC NORTH: Lions
NFC SOUTH: Buccaneers
NFC WEST: 49ers
————————-
Jets vs Bengals: Jets
Titans vs Raiders: Titans
Giants vs Lions: Giants
Buccaneers vs 49ers: Buccaneers
—————————
Jets vs Titans: Titans
Giants vs Buccaneers: Giants
—————————
Titans vs Giants: Titans
You had every chance to use Bill Nye the Science guy for the the Bills.
I mean cmon
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
The Packers one makes it look like they killed the Bears and Lions and are preparing them for the Vikings next meal.
It would take a miracle for the Saints to win, but that’s literally what they’re known for so…
Giants if titans don’t have magic
Cardinals should have had some catholic leaders lol. Good with Op
Well first off, one thing all Saints have in common is they’re dead. So Saints are bottom of the NFC South.
Do you get to fight the dolphins on land or have to fight in the water?
AFC East:
A bunch of guys named Bill use their money and legislature to slant the government into the favorite. The Patriots are powerless to stop them, because the guys named Bill are getting their bills passed legally and making them part of American culture, framing the evil Dolphins as perpetrators of all crimes. The guys named Bill walk to to the menacing army of jets (which cannot move without human power), and utilize them to first abolish the dolphins, then turn on the patriots, and finally suicide bomb into all remaining jets. Bill supremacyÂ
Dallas fans are in shambles trying to decide if they’re bigger fans of literal Cowboys or literal Texans.
Lets goooooooo! Haven’t heard this one yet. Love the MS paint work there OP
I choose to believe the Falcons are actually named after the Millennium Falcon and that dainty bird is just a cover for the fact that we can do the kessell run in under 12 parsecs
The Titans and Giants is just AOT
Packers should be packing cheese and the Chiefs should be Indian Chiefs
It would depend on the size of each team. If we are sticking to 11v11:
​
AFC East: Jets, Bills, Patriots, Dolphins
AFC North: Bengals, Steelers, Ravens, Browns
AFC South: Titans, Jaguars, Texans, Colts
AFC West: Chiefs, Raiders, Broncos, Chargers
NFC East: Giants, Cowboys, Commanders, Eagles
NFC North: Bears, Lions, Vikings, Packers
NFC South: Panthers, Buccaneers, Falcons, Saints
NFC West: Rams, 49ers, Seahawks, Cardinals
c’mon man. at least show a peregrine falcon, the fastest animal on the freaking planet.
Titans/giants of Greek mythos solo the league tbh.
The only thing the jets can win…
New York team you use the wrong type of jet mr
Why tf are all the Texans fans in Arlington Rangers jerseys?
This post is peak offseason material and I’m here for all of it.
There is no bird named a Seahawk – I thing the picture is a pair of Ospreys
Does the brown noise count? No one can win if they’re uncontrollably shitting themselves
38 comments
Probably Giants
Titans stomp. Literally.
Probably the titans or jets
The Browns one is hilariously sad lol
Actually the Cardinals are a 1940s baseball dynasty
Fuckin Raiders cracked me up. 💀
Got a good laugh out of some of these. Thanks for that.
Unless Jets or Giants can kill Titans, it’s the Titans.
Titans and it’s not close. It took 10 years for a pantheon of literal gods to defeat them.
You cannot defeat a color
Saints with a miracle.
That’s exactly how I picture the Chiefs
Raiders will run in before the rest of the teams are ready.
Leeeroy mmmJenkinnnssss!!!!
I’m going Bears or Lions with this one. Maybe slight edge to lions since they work together as a group.
Nah, Jets stomp Titans. An F-16 could annihilate Kronos
AFC EAST: Jets
ACF NORTH: Bengals
AFC SOUTH: Titans
AFC WEST: Raiders
NFC EAST: Giants
NFC NORTH: Lions
NFC SOUTH: Buccaneers
NFC WEST: 49ers
————————-
Jets vs Bengals: Jets
Titans vs Raiders: Titans
Giants vs Lions: Giants
Buccaneers vs 49ers: Buccaneers
—————————
Jets vs Titans: Titans
Giants vs Buccaneers: Giants
—————————
Titans vs Giants: Titans
You had every chance to use Bill Nye the Science guy for the the Bills.
I mean cmon
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
BILL
The Packers one makes it look like they killed the Bears and Lions and are preparing them for the Vikings next meal.
It would take a miracle for the Saints to win, but that’s literally what they’re known for so…
Giants if titans don’t have magic
Cardinals should have had some catholic leaders lol. Good with Op
Well first off, one thing all Saints have in common is they’re dead. So Saints are bottom of the NFC South.
Do you get to fight the dolphins on land or have to fight in the water?
AFC East:
A bunch of guys named Bill use their money and legislature to slant the government into the favorite. The Patriots are powerless to stop them, because the guys named Bill are getting their bills passed legally and making them part of American culture, framing the evil Dolphins as perpetrators of all crimes. The guys named Bill walk to to the menacing army of jets (which cannot move without human power), and utilize them to first abolish the dolphins, then turn on the patriots, and finally suicide bomb into all remaining jets. Bill supremacyÂ
Dallas fans are in shambles trying to decide if they’re bigger fans of literal Cowboys or literal Texans.
Lets goooooooo! Haven’t heard this one yet. Love the MS paint work there OP
I choose to believe the Falcons are actually named after the Millennium Falcon and that dainty bird is just a cover for the fact that we can do the kessell run in under 12 parsecs
The Titans and Giants is just AOT
Packers should be packing cheese and the Chiefs should be Indian Chiefs
It would depend on the size of each team. If we are sticking to 11v11:
​
AFC East: Jets, Bills, Patriots, Dolphins
AFC North: Bengals, Steelers, Ravens, Browns
AFC South: Titans, Jaguars, Texans, Colts
AFC West: Chiefs, Raiders, Broncos, Chargers
NFC East: Giants, Cowboys, Commanders, Eagles
NFC North: Bears, Lions, Vikings, Packers
NFC South: Panthers, Buccaneers, Falcons, Saints
NFC West: Rams, 49ers, Seahawks, Cardinals
c’mon man. at least show a peregrine falcon, the fastest animal on the freaking planet.
Titans/giants of Greek mythos solo the league tbh.
The only thing the jets can win…
New York team you use the wrong type of jet mr
Why tf are all the Texans fans in Arlington Rangers jerseys?
This post is peak offseason material and I’m here for all of it.
There is no bird named a Seahawk – I thing the picture is a pair of Ospreys
Does the brown noise count? No one can win if they’re uncontrollably shitting themselves
Bills. We print money to fight endless wars